The Friday Five: People To Avoid In College

Throughout your college years, you will likely meet and befriend some of the most important people (outside of your family) in your life thus far. In the past, I’ve discussed the different types of guys, girls, friends, roommates, couples and professors you will encounter at your university, but I have yet to talk about the less savory characters in detail. That’s why this week’s installment of “The Five People You Meet In College” will focus on the five people you don’t want to get stuck with in the four years to come.

The Friday Five: People To Avoid In College

1. The Player.
He considers himself “The Man” because of the harem he keeps in tow at all times and the approval that his buddies demonstrate when he tells them his stories. A commitment-phobe with little interest in finding a semi-permanent girlfriend, The Player knows exactly what to say to keep his girls waiting around for him. With a hint of “Nobody gets me like you do” and a whole lot of “I’m just so busy right now,” he has a revolving door of young ladies and a few hopefuls that keep coming back. (Girls, if he’s dropped half his classes, has no extracurriculars or job, and still claims to be too busy to make time for you… steer clear!) The Player may eventually reform, but he has no immediate plans to change his ways and settle down.

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2. The Leech.
The leech can come in all shapes and sizes. Maybe he or she likes to use you for frequent car rides without offering to reciprocate or pay you for gas, or perhaps this person shows up at every party empty-handed, ready to eat all of your food/drink all of your booze. It doesn’t matter how this person is using you, as long as you can identify that you are in fact being taken advantage of. Friendship is not about keeping track of who owes what, but it is important to be aware of when things have become one-sided.

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3. The One Who Just Shows Up.
You met this person early freshman year, he followed you home like a lost puppy and now you can’t get rid of him. You’ve awaken from naps and stopped in the middle of important study sessions to find him at your door, looking for a place to hang out at the least convenient times. It is important to be a hospitable host or hostess, even during your freshman year, but with this person on your couch at random hours of the day, giving you unwarranted advice on how you keep your dorm room, it isn’t always easy to be welcoming.

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4. The Fake Friend.
The Fake Friend is someone you spend a lot of time with, who focuses mainly on his or her own personal issues and becomes conveniently unavailable when you need to talk to him or her about your own problems. This person is one of the first people you text when something has happened in your life, but he or she is most likely to spread gossip about you or put your interests last. Nevertheless, The Fake Friend constantly greets you with an enthusiastic hug or by shrieking your name in an otherwise quiet location, content that his or her negative motives won’t be discovered for another year or so.

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5. The One Who Goes Crazy.
You’ll meet at least one of these when you move into the dorms, and although they are incredibly entertaining to observe, you should try and avoid these people at all costs. The One Who Goes Crazy generally starts out as one of those innocent students who was sheltered by his or her strict parents for the past 18 years and hasn’t had the opportunity to date, stay out past 8 p.m., etc. (Bonus points if they’re home-schooled or part of a magnet program!) Because this person was not previously exposed to the typical high school debauchery, he or she instead often experiences a new type of freedom in college that can erupt in chaos. Suddenly, your friend who had never kissed a boy is suddenly trading in boyfriends the way old rich guys trade in fancy cars, attending parties that sound suspiciously like raves, experimenting with mullets and posting provocative photos all over the Internet. Once this monster has been created, she cannot be stopped!

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What are some of the types of people you would suggest avoiding in college?