The Weekend Five: Terrible Party Themes

As someone who loves to host her share of get-togethers, I am a huge fan of theme parties. In the past year, I have thrown a Random Decades Party and an indoor Garden Party, and I had a lot of fun with both of those. Of course, with my 22nd birthday just about three months away, I’ve already started thinking of potential themes (because yes, I’m still young enough to dress up in costume for virtually no reason at all if I want to!). Having said that, I’ve also concluded that there are several themes I won’t be suggesting to friends any time soon. Think of this as a guide on how not to throw a party that you want people to attend.

The Weekend Five: Terrible Party Themes

1. Hunger Games.
This type of theme party starts out as just a way for people to express themselves. Guests dress up in costumes that represent their respective districts, and practice their archery skills from the window. Then, the party takes a horrible turn when guests begin fighting to the death, while others (dressed as Capitol folk) watch the madness intently. Pro: You don’t have to spend money on food, because you don’t have to feed anyone at this party. Con: You lose a lot of friends this way.

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2. Clowns.
Everybody dresses up as a clown. This is a terrible party theme because clowns are terrifying. Pro: None. Con: Everyone in your house is dressed up as a clown.

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3. Bieber Fever.
Guys brush their hair to the side to create the Justin Bieber look, while female guests arrive as screaming fangirls while Justin’s music plays in the background alongside a Radio Disney soundtrack. Meanwhile, a few intellectuals with an appreciation for the ironic will arrive dressed in lab coats, determined to find the source of the Bieber Fever epidemic and discover its antidote before it’s too late. Pro: You finally have a reason to admit that you still (sort of) watch the Disney Channel. Con: You start to have Jonas Brothers flashbacks.

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4. “Political” Party.
At this shindig, guests dress up as their favorite (or least favorite) politicians and then act just like extreme parodies of them. Guys dressed as Bush can do kegstands while the Romneys of the room scoff and talk about how much money they have, and the Bill Clintons hit on every girl who enters the room. Most girls will likely dress as Sarah Palin and use the words “maverick,” “bulldog,” “Alaska” and “Putin” as much as they can. Pro: Great way for the older generation to stop accusing us of not being interested in politics. Con: Not politically accurate.

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5. Goffik Invasion.
For those unfamiliar with my fascination with poorly written fanfiction, this party is based around the infamous My Immortal, a dreadful account of the Harry Potter series through the eyes of a gothic 17-year-old and gothic versions of the characters we’ve grown to love. In this story, she refers to nearly everyone as either a “goff” or a “poser prep,” so at this party, guests should dress as members of either category. Interestingly enough, unless any of those guests actually identify as gothic, everyone who attends will technically be considered a poser prep. (On second thought, I might throw this party after all!) Pro: You can cite your knowledge of depressing music that you haven’t listened to since you were thirteen. Con: What are you going to do with all that white makeup once the party is over?

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What are some awful party themes that you can think of?